Tuesday, June 7, 2011

How to Deal with Quarter Life Crisis

You have probably leaped from one job to another a couple of hundred times already. Now, your mind is throbbing and your heart is palpitating ever so severely because you are itching to make another jump from your transcription specialist post. You plan to take a jump to who knows where and you might land splat dead. So before that happens, read on! This might be the answer to your quarter life crisis.

First, breathe in… breathe out… Calm your nerves. Call your doctor for a check-up tomorrow. You heard from the radio that too much thinking could tear more ulcer holes in your stomach. Visit the doctor. Doctor says you need to take a leave from work just to rest and relax.

Decide to quit work. Visit your mother who is all alone after your dad had decided to work as a chef in Hongkong. Currently, she is living with your aunt. Wear the brightest yellow top you can find in your closet. Wish that your shirt can do the brightening up for your mother when your mouth cannot curve to a compulsive smile. Her blood pressure may rise when she hears you have just quit your work.

Sleep at your aunt’s place tonight. Wait for five days until you share the news to your mom. The span of five days is the optimum to break it to her gently. On the first day of your stay, you will feel like your savings are depleting while your friends are busily earning their way up the corporate ladder. That is understandable. Don’t feel bad. Eat porridge. It will calm your nerves. Take a walk under the bright round yellow summer sun and absorb the positive energy of the kids on the playground. It may just perk you up incase you do not have a spare yellow shirt.

As you walk, take a journey down memory lane. What were your hobbies as a child? What made you happy? Remember the times when your mom baked banana walnut muffins for your neighbors. You would stealthily visit the fridge every so often until your mom thought there were rats in the fridge and decided to buy a new one.

On the second day, think that you may not be for the corporate world. Ask your mom to teach you how to bake. Learn to bake for the next couple of days. Compile the recipes and start a coffee shop nearby. Your mom says your muffins are as hard as your father’s head, and your sponge cake can pass as a paperweight. Go back to your room. Cry. Call a friend. Cry to that friend. It will calm your nerves.

Your friend says, “try writing.” You have learned a great plenty of words –xerophagia, economy class syndrome, endoscopic retrograde cholangiopancreatography. So on the third day, write an article or two about ulcer. Send a pitch to a local medical magazine. You receive a reply: “Thank you for your query. Sorry, we cannot use your articles because we are only accepting contributions from medical doctors.”

Consider becoming a doctor on the fourth day. Connect those terms to actual practice. Check if you have six years to spare. But if you feel old, like the many others who are undergoing this same crisis, choose a different path. Run along the pace of the clock, maybe read some self-help books on the fifth day. “Finding Your Niche” sounds nice.

The books will say reflect on what you want to do in life. Do not mind what your mom, your friend, the medical magazine editor, or whoever, tells you to do. While you reflect, fix your things. Fix your mom’s things. This will help lessen her blood pressure when you announce the news later.
While you fix your things, survey the trashes. Learn how to recycle. Sew bags out of used plastics; create a business plan out of it. Get ideas from your files five jobs ago, when you worked as sales for a nonprofit organization.

Build up your inventory. Try sewing ten bags per design. Tell your mom the news and hire her as a quality checker. She tells you to go back and find a job. Try again. Maybe create something smaller. A wallet, perhaps. Thank your mom for her help. Give her the first wallet you’ve made. Try making pop-up greeting cards also. Learn from youtube. Give your mom a pop-up “Thank You” card.

Return to your condo and sign up for classes. Work on the skills that you enjoy doing. Find a partner who is of a complementing temperament. “Two heads are better than one” must have come from somewhere. Rest, as the doctor has advised.

When you wake up, go do something. Anything.

*This is a creative fiction piece.