Thursday, May 13, 2010

The Dreaded "M" Word

Recently, I've been told that maybe it's time to talk about the dreaded "M" word. It's so dreadful to me that I think I nearly suffered a headache after a few minutes of discussion. For one, he says that he needs to plan for the next couple of years. (By now, you probably know what the "M" word is all about.) He needs to decide where he should minister and see if I should already be in the picture (or not), so I said "okay then" with a long sigh.

You may ask why I dislike talking about the "M" word. It's not that I don't see myself being with my beloved for the rest of my life. The fear stretches from the lack of knowledge in the tasks of being a domestic engineer, the problems other couples face regarding their children, and all the other difficult adjustments. Obviously, I'm not ready for it yet and I believe many women are feeling the same way even after the BIG day.

We all know that marriage is a union between a husband and a wife. (NOTE: A husband and A wife only) This is when they "cleave" and "weave." The man and woman will "cleave" or separate from their parents as they "weave" and start their own family. Marriage is not merely a simple means of procreation, it is a sacred gift from God that brings a lifetime of love, joy and a sense of purpose to those involved. Well, this gift of lifetime of love, joy and a sense of purpose can only be enjoyed by those who have God as the center of their relationship. You see, men and women are so different, and almost always the opposite personalities attract each other. Thus, it's almost impossible for them to see each other eye to eye.

Let me give you one simple illustration. I'm the type of girl who sometimes adds a few funny remarks on serious talks, just to liven things up. My partner on the other hand, thinks that we should be serious all the time when tackling such matters. There's no middle ground. There's no way to see each other eye to eye. Without God, the tendency would be is to push/pull each other to one's own preference. There's no head, no mediator, no one to hold them accountable, no right, no wrong. Probably this is why people end up getting divorced.

Marriage is written by God. As I said, it's not simply a means to procreate. It is a love story. God always writes very interesting love stories. Maybe soon, I'd feature some here. He can make it plain and clear that there's one among the many other believers (or fish in the sea) that's best suitable for us. He'd bring man and woman who are very much opposites together, to share the same burden, the same mission and vision in life.

Marriage is also a calling. I read from a Christian author that both man and wife have the primary responsibility of leading their children closer to God. This is probably one of the most difficult tasks a couple can ever face. The greatest weakness of a person are usually sealed from public and are exposed only at home. It would take humility and God's grace to really bind a home with love and transform it to a shining blessing in the community.

Maybe the "M" word is not so scary after all. It's a BIG step of faith that can take us somewhere new, somewhere great and somewhere impossible.


  1. Menchie Dear.....

    Although I'm still single (and very much young), I do agree with your fears for they are all valid ones!

    What I fear the most about marriage is the "no choice" aspect of it. No choice meaning whatever horns he suddenly sprouts, I'm in it for life. I don't like hurting someone and I don't like getting hurt. That scares me the most.

    However, there is only ONE primary reason (one na, primary pa....) why I will get married. That is to glorify God.

    For me, getting married is also a ministry. I've always envisioned myself partnering with God by getting married with someone who shares the same evangelistic passion as I do.

    Maybe if you can see the dreaded "M" word as fulfilling God's purpose for your life, you won't fear it as much.

    Enjoy the ride!! Life is short! :)

  2. vp of housewives clubMay 16, 2010 at 9:43 PM

    can you feature my lab story soon? hahaha

    w/ pics ha!

  3. @ Fifi - I totally agree with you that more than anything else, the purpose of being in a relationship is to glorify God. :)

  4. @ VP of housewives club - sure, email it to me soon. ;)